Laurie James
Welcome to Confessions of a Freebird podcast. I'm your host, Laurie James, a mother, divorcee, recovering caregiver, the author of Sandwiched A Memoir of Holding on and Letting go, a therapy junkie, relationship coach, somatic healer, and now podcaster. I'm a free spirit and here to lift you up. On this podcast, I'll share soulful confessions, and empowering conversations with influential experts. So you can learn to spread your wings and make the most of your second half. So pop in those earbuds turn up the volume. And let's get inspired because my mission is to help you create your most joyful, purpose driven life. One confession at a time.
Laurie James
Hello, Freebirds! Thank you for being here with me and I am so honored to have today's guest with me and I have to confess I manifested my guest today before I even knew her. I wanted to interview a powerhouse female on the topic of money and finances. And let me just say the universe delivered, you are going to be so wowed by my guest today. She, like me, roots her teaching and overcoming limiting beliefs and helps her clients tap into their inner strength and wisdom. And I couldn't think of a better topic to discuss in the new year than money and finances. So if you've ever struggled with the word money or finances, this is a must listen conversation. Today, I have the pleasure to speak with Barbara Huson previously known as Barbara Stanny. She's the leading authority on women wealth and power. As a best selling author, financial therapist, teacher wealth coach Barbara has helped millions take charge of their finances and their lives. Barb has a background in business, her years as a journalist, her Master's in Counseling Psychology, her extensive research, personal experience with money gives her a unique perspective and makes her the foremost expert on empowering women to live up to their financial and personal potential. Barbara is also the author of seven, yes, seven books with her most recent book Rewire for Wealth and the founder of the wealth connection. She has been featured on major media outlets, including the Today Show, CNN, New York Times and has been invited to speak around the world. So thank you so much, Barbara, for taking the time out to have this conversation with me today.
Barbara Huson
No, I really appreciae of you asking me. Thank you.
Laurie James
Thank you. So how about we start with telling our listeners a little bit about how you started helping women around money.
Barbara Huson
I still to this day cannot believe this is what I and I've been doing this for 40 years and I can't believe it. So I grew up wealthy my father was the author of H&R block. And the only advice he ever gave me about money was "Don't worry." And I thought that was great advice. I didn't want to worry, I just wanted to spend it. And there was always someone to take care of me there first there was my father. Then there was my husband, who was a stockbroker. So he was perfect. But as I found out early in our marriage, he was a compulsive gambler. And over the course of our 15 year marriage, I knew he was gambling. I find out all the time. And yet, the insane part is I continued to let him manage the money because that's how intimidated I was and terrified by anything financial. Finally, after 15 years, we got a divorce. And I decided money is not my thing. I do not want to deal with money. I have this theory that if you don't deal with your money, your money will deal with you. Yeah, I know. You probably know that one too. And then next year, I got tax bills for way over a million dollars for bad taxes. My husband didn't pay for illegal deals done is in my signature was in everything because I just signed whatever he told me to sign and he had left the country. I was left holding the bag. My father wouldn't lend me the money. I didn't have anywhere close to a million, nothing. And that's when I knew I had to get smart about my money. I had three daughters one was just a baby. So I did what you're supposed to do. I read the books, I took the classes and my brain would fogged up and my eyes would glaze over. And I just figured out I was terminally but I was committed. And I believe when you are committed like no back door, universe revolves to help you reach your goal. And I was a journalist writing for the San Francisco Business Time. I was hired for a freelance project to interview women who were smart with money. Those interviews changed my life. I not only got smart about money, what I wrote my first book, Prince Charming Isn't Coming, that was me getting smart about money. And suddenly, I had this whole new career. And now seven books later here I am talking to you as an expert.
Laurie James
Yes. Wow, what a journey.
Barbara Huson
It's amazing where life takes you.
Laurie James
I know. So why do you think women have difficulty making and or managing money?
Barbara Huson
I learned, I discovered this when I wrote my first book, which was in 1985. And I realized that women's difficulties and I've seen it over and over and over again, our difficulties with money has little if anything to do with money, per se. It is our fear or ambivalence about power. I define a powerful woman as someone who knows who she is, knows what she wants, and expresses that in the world unapologetically. So creating wealth, attracting money that we can retain, maintain and grow, demands that we step into our power, it demands that we speak up and say what we want, instead of watering ourselves down. So we're afraid of making waves?
Laurie James
Yeah, yeah. And so often, we as women do that, because we're nurturers and we're people pleasers, right? And so we don't want to make those waves. And so we act we ask, I know that I did that for years.
Barbara Huson
I think it goes deeper than that. I remember, when I first discovered this while I was doing interviews for my first book, that it wasn't until women were courageous enough to step into their power, that they broke through the barriers that kept them financially in turmoil. And I remember saying that I met was interviewing a psychologist who specializes in money. And I said to her, why do you think women are so afraid of their power? And she said something that gave me chills, she said, Because powerful women have been burned at the stake. It is part of our collective unconsciousness, that for generations and generations before them, we have been severely punished for being powerful.
Laurie James
Yeah. And that generational trauma stays with us. Right?
Barbara Huson
It definitely stays with us, it is definitely a part of who we are. And now I think we are at a time in our history, when we need women to step into their power to step up to the plate along with enlightened men. And that's who's going to change the world.
Laurie James
Yes, I agree. And I'm on board.
Barbara Huson
I know you are you. But you, I would call you a powerful woman.
Laurie James
Oh, thank you. And you know what, I haven't always felt that way. And based off of my history, and my own personal childhood trauma and leaving a very difficult marriage, I haven't always felt that way. But I feel like in my late 50s, mid 50s, late 50s, I've been able to step into my own power, and create a life that is meaningful and purposeful, for me, while also being able to bring in financial means for myself. And that's the scary thing to do. Right? It's hard to make that shift.
Barbara Huson
You know, it's interesting. One of the things that really helped me when I went to write my second book is Secrets of Six Figure Women. So I was interviewing women who made six and seven figures. And one of the things that fascinated me, they were all very powerful woman, you can imagine, right? Very confident. But they all said to me, half there's a little girl inside me that just wants to be liked. And I thought, that's the way I think most of us feel we want to be liked. We are relationship oriented. But the thing that got me and the thing that made the difference for me, is they all said, in the world of work. It's not a popularity contest. In the world of work. I rather be respected than liked. But when I could make that shift, and what I found all these women, while in the world of work, they knew they'd rather be respected and like they still have their, what I call their love nests, their circle of friends and family and people that they could be that little girl with that they could get that kind of support. So I don't know that we'll ever dispense of that feeling of wanting to be nurtured and taken care of and be liked and be popular. But it's a discipline.
Laurie James
But I love that differentiation. The difference between being respected and being liked, that is huge, because oftentimes I think women in general move through the world of I want to be liked. And that comes first and foremost. And I think that tells me if you disagree, but that comes from our people pleasing side of us, or part of us, where respect is standing into being unapologetically yes. And standing up for what we are authentic self, and what we feel like we want out of life.
Barbara Huson
You got this, but I think our people pleasing was a primitive survival mechanism for us. I think because of our we're not as strong as men tend to be. And we were the nurturers and caretakers, and all of us men and women need to be liked, because we would never have survived our primal ancestors would never have survived, being rejected from the tribe meant certain death. So I think our brains are wired to be people pleaser.
Laurie James
So having said that, how do men and women differ in the way they process financial information, then if we're wired differently from the beginning? How does that play into our finances?
Barbara Huson
That's interesting, I'm gonna get a free call next month on the difference between men and women and money. But one of the biggest differences is that women and men process financial information differently. A man who has been groomed to take risks, looks at the market looks at making and managing money. And it's exciting. It's an exciting challenge for them. We look at the market, and it's threatening, there's a fear of loss. And so we need to have different than and the financial industry is very male oriented. It does not speak to the emotional aspects of women and we women. That's why I think it's really important to find people in this arena that understand us, my financial advisor's a man and I'm telling you, he's got up being a female part because he totally gets it.
Laurie James
That's good. Because I think all the financial people that I've had interactions with outside of women have not had it, including my current one, who I love. He's doing a great job. But he doesn't quite understand that. One of the two that I work with does the other one doesn't. Just okay, I think they're doing a good job. So I'm okay.
Barbara Huson
But I think it's important in our education, as we learn as we grow into managing money and making more of it, that we find people that understand us as women and our mentality, our mindset and how we approach this. And that's why I created a community. I've had it for five or six years. It's a community of women supporting women. It's called The Wealth Connection. And we talk about money as women, which is very different than the way men talk about it.
Laurie James
Yes. Wow. I love that. I need to look into that.
Barbara Huson
Oh, I would love you, too. It's a profound experience. Because what researchers found and research came out, I think it was Emory University that found that first, the women's brain lights up the parts of the deals with the finances, lights up when they are in a female only group. Because women learn best with other women. They learn quicker, their confidence grows faster. It's very important.
Laurie James
Wow, I did not know that. I love that. That's wonderful information to know. So you said when we met problems about money or never about money? Can you tell me more about that?
Barbara Huson
Yeah. So clients come to me, and their problems are always money. But I know there's something deeper under that. And it's always have something to do with their fear or ambivalence about power, as we talked about earlier. And so just like they say, finances are the number one sources of arguments in marriages. It's never about money. It's always about power. So if you can address the real issues, the money takes care of and see one thing about money that I find so fascinating why I love working in this field, because money tends to amplify or magnifies what is already there. Like people talk about their shame around money. The money doesn't produce the shame. The money amplifies the shame that's already within.
Laurie James
Right.
Barbara Huson
Just like money will amplify the trauma that they've experienced. It's not the money that's causing them the trauma, it's the previous trauma that money to add to the light on.
Laurie James
I love that. So can you tell me a little bit more and maybe like give an example of that for my listeners who may not make that connection?
Barbara Huson
Yeah, I'll give you an example. In fact, I just wrote a blog on it. I remember having a conversation not long ago with a girlfriend, and my girlfriend grew up very poor. And I grew up very wealthy. And we both had tremendous shame around money. I had tremendous shame because it made me feel different. She had tremendous pain, because it made her feel less that. But the point is, as we got deeper into our conversation, we realized the shame was there. All the wealth I had, and all the poverty she had just amplified it, magnified it, made it come out.
Laurie James
Yeah, and I can remember, there were times in my life, because I didn't grow up with very much money. My parents did a lot of things with the money that they had. But as I went out into the world, I definitely felt that too. And at times, I felt less than unsure about myself, and how are people going to look upon me, I don't have that designer this or the nice that or whatever it was. And now I know, that's not what's important.
Barbara Huson
But it's it's important. In the your interpretation of that's important. How you see it, like I got the exact same feelings, I the exact same feelings. What do people think about me the way I dress because it made me different than most of the other kids took my mom to dress me and very nice clothes. What would they say we lived in this huge house, I always tell people like me, or didn't like me, because of my parents money.
Laurie James
Right. So you felt different. And as a child, we want to be more alike than different. So your friend who grew up in poverty didn't want to be in poverty. But you felt different because you had all this money. And both caused that same shame. Yeah. So how does somebody who is experiencing that even now in their 50s or 60s, how do you suggest they start addressing that.
Barbara Huson
It is a gift. If when money triggers something in you, it's a gift, because it's showing you there's something probably in your unconscious, that needs to be healed for you to move forward? So the first thing is be grateful. The second is to really start asking yourself some questions what's going on here? What is the belief that I am holding, because it is our beliefs. It is our beliefs that shape our reality, it's our belief that determine the choices we make is our beliefs that have us acting a certain way or not. So use it as an opportunity. And I think it's a good idea to get help to find a coach to find a therapist to find a brand to find a support group someone and to do something like I went to DA.
Barbara Huson
Like The Wealth Connection.
Barbara Huson
Like The Wealth Connection. That's why I did it. Yeah, it was really interesting, because I was really stuck. Like when I was in it when this also happened right after my no even even before my divorce, I was really stuck. I knew my husband was gambling, and I couldn't do anything. And I was just clueless around money. And I tried to learn and I couldn't learn. I was living in San Francisco. And I found out there was a group for women inheritors. And I joined that group. And for the first time, I didn't feel alone. There were other women struggling with the same thing. And I think that's the most powerful part of joining a group of like minded women, is that you're like you're not alone.
Laurie James
Yeah. And that is so huge, because so often, when you're going through something very difficult. I know that was, for me, when I was going through my very difficult time in my life. I felt very alone. Because none of my friends were going through it at that time. And they could sympathize with me, but they didn't really understand what was going on. And that is huge. Having that support group. For sure.
Barbara Huson
I know it's at one six figure woman told me who I asked when I was interviewing her. She said, success is a social activity. Success is a social activity. We are not meant to do this alone. And I really believe that getting smart or smarter about money is really important. We don't have to do it alone. We need to get help and help from support from our friends support from perhaps a coach and support from advisors. Like the women I've interviewed for all my books, the women who had the most, the highest net worth the most money, were not necessarily the women who made the most, but all of them, at least at some point, worked with advisors, work with a team of advisors. And that's what I think is important. We tried to do this alone and we struggled.
Laurie James
So that's a great segue into a question that just came up for me is if there's somebody listening to this, who may be our age, kind of midlife or beyond I feel like I'm pushing beyond. You probably aren't.
Barbara Huson
I'm way beyond.
Laurie James
But who feels like I don't have a lot in savings, I have some equity in my house, I don't have very much money in savings, if any, where do they start?
Barbara Huson
First of all, you start by making a commitment. That's the key is to make the commitment, whatever the goal is to get smart about money, to save more money, to create with whatever it is you need to commit, because whatever happens, you're going to come up against obstacles, and if you're not committed, and the second thing I always get support, even get a buddy to do it together a girlfriend, whatever, commitment and support are really important. And one of the things I like I always tell people to do first, and nobody wants to do it. But it's a really powerful exercise, which is why people don't want to do it. So just take my a little small notebook and start writing down everything you spend. Everything you spend, you write it down. It's called tracking your expenses, you write down what you bought, and how much you spent it. And that's all you do. And you keep doing that for a couple of months, and you're going to learn a lot about yourself. It's not just about money, we're just going to see where you're spending your money, does it fit your values, does if it's your priorities as you want to live? So just it's a consciousness racing exercise. Yeah. And just that exercise alone often prompts you to make some really significant changes. And it prompts questions like, do I really need this? Do I really want this? Is there a better way? Like when I did this years ago, when I wrote down everything I spend, is, oh, my God, I was spending so much on face creams. I couldn't believe it. And they were working, they're working now. Well, they're still not, but I, I'm not spending as much on them. So I could see some changes I wanted to make. And I was working with a coach. And she noticed that I had safety pins in my eyeglasses. She said, What's wrong with your eyeglasses? I said, Oh, I know, I need new ones. But there's so much money. She said, you're spending all this money on face cream. And then a necessity, like your glasses.
Laurie James
You're not willing to spend money on?
Barbara Huson
Yeah, so I just, it's the clarity about where your money is going? And are you making choices that are right for you, and they give you the best light?
Laurie James
Yeah. So I work with women who are thinking about divorce, maybe going through divorce or coming out the other end around dating. If there's a listener who is thinking about getting a divorce, and she knows that's ultimately what she wants to do, but might be afraid to do it. for financial reasons.
Barbara Huson
I've gotten two divorces. But now I have a really good husband.
Laurie James
Third time's the charm.
Barbara Huson
Third time's a charm. But anyway, my advice was, I'm really glad that first thing I did is get a lawyer. Because a lawyer saved me so much money, the lawyer your kept him from getting alimony from me. He tried, he tried like hell. So I would say get at least consult with a lawyer. Don't try to do it yourself. And what I've seen happens, and I'm so glad it didn't happen with me is that women just don't want the conflict. They don't want to make me mad. They want to be nice. They just want to get it over with it. Every woman I've ever met, who's done that has lived to regret it. They give up too much in order to have peace, and then they sacrifice themselves in the altar of peace. And it's not worth it.
Laurie James
Yeah, no, that's so true. And this is was my approach going through my divorces also, as much as you can a divorce is an emotional process and emotional split. But I tried to as best I could look at it as a financial situation. This is now a financial transaction. And also what I tried to do is, this is the biggest financial decision I am going to make in my lifetime. So I want to make sure that I am not being the people pleaser, or I didn't care. I mean, yes, I didn't want to drag my divorce out. But that was my opportunity to stand in my power of okay, I live in California. This is a 50/50 state. Stand up for what is yours. It's not a time to get revenge for everything that went wrong or that they did wrong. It's a time for you to stand up for okay, what is the pot? How much is there and how much is mine? And stand in that.
Barbara Huson
That's good. That's very admirable.
Laurie James
Thank you. It's not easy. It was one of the hardest things I had to do. But like you said, no one's gonna come save me. There's no prince charming. That's gonna save me on the other end. I had to take care of myself at that point.
Barbara Huson
I give you a lot of credit. What helped you stay strong like that.
Laurie James
What comes up for me is my four daughters, my four daughters and seeing their strength and the strength that I was able to give them as they were coming into their own. Because at the time, my youngest had just left for college and my oldest, had graduated a year or two, outside of college, and I saw how strong and independent they were becoming. So I use that as like, Okay, I raised these very strong women, but I didn't always feel strong inside. And I transferred that and was able to use that to stand on my own and say, Yes, and it's beautiful, because I just had a birthday a month ago, and the birthday cards that they write me in the Mother's Day cards, they write me, they always talk about how strong of a woman I am. And if that's something that I can pass on to them of- stand in your own power, but be your authentic self at the same time. How can we do that, and those don't always go hand in hand, people feel like they have to be somebody else to be in that power. No, you can do both.
Barbara Huson
But sometimes we have to take on a persona, that is powerful, like they tell you to stand it. And that really does help. It really does send the message to your brain. But it's interesting. What helped me is I had a spiritual teacher when I was going through this. And the spiritual teacher said to me, because I did not want to deal with money. And the spiritual teacher said to me, if you can't do it for you do it for people you love, or someone you love more than you. So my daughter is not because they were strong, because they were young. But because I did not want them to turn out to be the woman I was at that time that I had to I love them enough to do what I did not want to do.
Laurie James
Yeah, for them. Wow. That's beautiful. So can we talk about your most recent book about rewiring the brain for wealth? What does this book bring to readers that maybe your past books haven't brought to this topic?
Barbara Huson
It brings neuroscience. So it's interesting. So what happened is about I don't know about what came out. Five years before that book came out, something really weird happened. I was building this, I love my business. I love my work. It's like my ministry. It's like my mission. It's not a children job. But I started losing interested. And I noticed myself dreading going to my office. And I thought what's going on? And I felt something was missing. And it was something was missing in my work. Or was I just not supposed to work anymore? Was it time to stop? I didn't know I got very confused, very upset. I lost my interest. And so what I did is I learned over the years with when I get stuck like this is to surrender and not fight it. So I entered, I stopped taking on new clients, I stopped speaking I stopped, I just surrendered. I just said, Okay universe, if there's something I'm supposed to know, tell me. Yeah. And one day, I was reading my email. And there was an article about neuroscience. Now, I knew nothing about neuroscience. Now, I read this article, and I swear, my brain must have lit up like a Christmas tree because I knew this was the missing piece. So I spent about five years studying neuroscience, figuring out how to integrate it in the work I was already doing, with with psychology with spirituality and personal finance. And then I started applying it, to practicing it with my clients. And when you understand how to program your brain, it's amazing how quickly, you can break through all those barriers. But we don't understand that because all our behavior is determined by our brain and the way it's wired. But our brain is shaped is sculpted, that wiring is shaped by our mind. And our mind is the source of thoughts and feelings. So if we can understand how to use our thoughts and feelings to rewire our brain, we can more quickly efficiently change our behavior with much less resistance.
Laurie James
So if somebody is sitting here saying, Wow, that's really profound, which it is, and I love this crossroads between the two, what are two or three things that somebody can do outside of reading your book, because I would definitely recommend it and I have ordered it, can't wait to read it.
Barbara Huson
I'll give you three steps. Three steps to rewiring your brain so it took me a while to figure this out. I use them all the time. So let me tell you the three steps real quickly. Then I'll briefly explain what they are. The three steps are recognized, reframe and respond differently. Remember, what we want to do in order to change our behaviors with money is not to focus on the behaviors but to focus on the cause of those behaviors which are all the thoughts and feelings that have led up to that. So the first part is to notice what negative or unhealthy thoughts we're having about money, or just start noticing, for example, let's say, I'm thinking, there's not enough. There's not enough. There's never enough. Well, you keep thinking, you probably thought that thought ever since you were a child. Yeah. And you can think there was never enough. What happens is you keep thinking there's never enough you keep deepening that neural pathway that will absolutely cause you to behave as if there's never enough. The first step is you recognize, oh, I'm having what you recognize, not with criticism, not with judgment. But with curiosity. Isn't that interesting? I'm having a thought, there's never enough, or I'm having a thought, I'm not enough. So you just notice that and what that does, is it separates you, from your thoughts. I am having a thought
Laurie James
Which is all about the coaching, which then you become the observer. Keep going, I love it.
Barbara Huson
So what you want to do is you want to separate yourself from the thought, that is just the words going through your head, it is not true. It is not the actuality, you're telling your brain. So the first thing is, oh, isn't that interesting? I'm having the thought there's not enough. Second step, you reframe that thought. You reframe it as an affirmation. So there's never enough, you start saying, Oh, there's more than enough. There's absolutely plenty, whatever you keep saying over and over. Now, will you believe it? No, you will not believe it. You're not supposed to believe but you say it, because our words, the words that come out of our mouth or through our thoughts are so powerful, that would hit those neurons that are talking to each other. Yeah. And when you start saying there's more than enough, those neurons will start moving over and building the new neural pathway. Yeah, there's enough in that old neural pathway, there's never enough we'll start weakening. So you have to say it over and over again. Oh, there's more than enough. There's plenty like I keep a post it note right next to me, that says, I can handle this. And that's my thing is I can't do this, Oh, I get scared. And I go, Yeah, I can handle this. So you recognize it with curiosity and thought, you reframe it oh there's more than enough. And then you refined as if that really were true. So you respond in a way that you normally don't, you respond in a way that will not feel comfortable. If you respond, and he feels comfortable. You're just doing the same old. So you respond differently. So let's say there's never enough. So you don't respond by spending it all, like pretending there's enough. No, you respond by Oh, if there's not enough, maybe I should take this money and put it in savings. Or maybe maybe I should start writing down what I spend in that. So you start creating behaviors that will support that reframe. So if you recognize the unhealthy thought, you reframe, reframe it, and respond as if that unhealthy thought that we thought was true.
Laurie James
Love it. And that's the whole premise of coaching, right? You can use that framework for just about any thought too. It could be money, it could be because it's really when we think about it, it's lack or abundance, fear or love.
Barbara Huson
Yeah, the only differences with coaching is you want to go underneath it, you want to go deeper. To look at where those old beliefs came from right, you're dealing with this, you just reframe it, and it helps you understand where it came from. But you don't need to, I guess you don't need to.
Laurie James
No, I think it's always good to try and understand where it came from, personally, or maybe that's just my own personal desire.
Laurie James
For me too. like, I'm a junkie and looking, where did that come from? Where does that stem from?
Laurie James
Right? So we started with this a little bit and I know spirituality is a big part of your life. In your opinion, what are the crossroads of spirituality and money too?
Barbara Huson
It's interesting, because my sixth book, I call it my coming up book is when I came out of the spiritual closet, it was it's called Sacred Success, a course in financial miracle, and for me my journey to financial independence to financial health. It was a very spiritual journey, very spiritual. And I believe that when you bring this questions of the Divine into discussions of the almighty dollar, it just brings a whole new level of and purpose into this journey with money.
Laurie James
Yeah, I love that. Because I think spirituality was a huge piece in my healing and through and through writing my book too. And sometimes it can be scary to put that out in the world to combine those because many people think of it as very black and white, where spirituality is, it isn't as black and white and it's what's the right word, just intangible is the right word where money is tangible. So bringing those two together I think is a beautiful thing to understand the relationship between the two.
Barbara Huson
And that book Sacred Success, I have a line in there that I put in and took out, I put it and I took out, and I decided at the end to keep it in. And it was so interesting when Sacred Success came out. I got this glowing review from Publishers Weekly. And the review started with this line that I kept thinking I should take out. And the line was that I believe wealth is God made visible. Because it allows us in this world we live in on this planet. Money allows us to create the life we were born to live, it helps us heal this planet, it helps us contribute to causes we feel strongly about. It's not least for women, it's not about amassing riches. It's about what we can do with our money. Because when men you ask men no matter how much money they have, it's been shown study after study, no matter how much they have. They're all about profit, perks and prestige. They're all about it women, once we have enough food, are good enough to have food on the table, a roof over our heads, we're gonna pretty much motivated by money. Yeah, we may want to make money, I want to make money. But what motivates us is the opportunity to help others to give back to our communities.
Laurie James
To service others. Yes, that is so true. And that's what I feel is driving me to recreate and reinvent myself in midlife, because I stayed home to raise my kids for 20 plus years. And making that shift was very, not only did I leave my marriage, but like reinvented myself at the same time, which is talking about getting out of your comfort zone.
Barbara Huson
Laurie, that was really impressive. I would love to have a conversation about how you did that someday.
Laurie James
I would love to share that. Yes, definitely. I'm happy to. So as we come to a close here, what is one confession that you'd like to share with our listeners that you haven't already shared? And maybe your aha or take away from it.
Barbara Huson
I guess my confession would be and I don't know if this is a confession, because I alluded to it because a lot of women feel this way. But it was until I realized that a lot of women feel this way that I would ever admit it. I don't care about making money, I don't really care. I have learned how to create wealth. I'm very comfortable. But I don't really care about making money.
Laurie James
So what do you care about, then if you don't mind sharing,
Barbara Huson
I care about doing what God put me on this earth to do, to serve in the way that I meant to serve? Yeah, I've never changed. I've never cared about money. I've never been motivated by money. I've never been motivated by building a business. I'm motivated by helping others. I remember when I went through this thing with my gambling husband, and I lost all my money and night at a bit paxville. Someone said to me, you should write a book on how not to get ripped off by men or women. And I thought, that is why I'm here. That is why I'm here. I'm here to help women. Yeah, into their power. So it's really I'm not even, it's not even money I care about. It's helping women step into their power. That's what I care about.
Laurie James
Yeah, that's beautiful. I love that. Thank you so much for being here. How can people find you? And how can people find your books, and The Wealth Connection and your coaching services and everything that you offer.
Barbara Huson
So you can go to my website, Barbara,hyphen, Huson, h-u-s-o-n, Barbara, hyphen, huson.com. And on there, the only I only do coaching for members of my community, which is a call to action, and you can learn about it out there. And it's on my website, and it's very affordable. And you can learn about my books and everything else you want to know.
Laurie James
Thank you. And we'll have your website in the show notes. So everybody can click on that and find more about you and all the wonderful work that you're doing in the world. So thank you, Barbara, so much for being here with us today. I so appreciate your time.
Barbara Huson
I really love talking to you. Thank you.
Laurie James
Thanks.
Laurie James
Thank you for listening to this episode of Confessions of a Freebird. I'm grateful to be in your ears and hearts. If you're interested in becoming a free bird, I'd love to support you. Please check out my website at Laurieejames.com to learn how we can work together or to sign up for my newsletter. So you can receive tips on how to date and relationship differently and ultimately find more freedom and joy in your life. If you found this podcast helpful, please follow or subscribe rate and review and share it with friends so they can find more freedom in their second or third act also. Until next time.